SPEEDING THROUGH TOMORROW

Wasn't it just yesterday that I was preparing for the dreaded yard sale? Looking at all the unnecessary 'stuff' which continues to reside in the garage and closets, I have to wonder if there really was a yard sale at all. But, of course there was. And, yes, we survived. We made the most out of it we possibly could by inviting a few of the Grandchildren to assist. They, I know, had a great time. They had a sleep-over the night prior to the sale and since we had various tripods set up as a photography studio, they monopolized the entire second floor to produce their very own movie! I didn't know at the time that they had all planned this, so they each arrived with various costumes that, when donned, caused each one to 'assume the role'! We were treated to the finished product, found it quite hilarious and knew that their joy far outweighed the angst of having to help with the yard sale. They did, however, sell enough of their own things to pay for a whole day at Kings Island and THAT was worth spending a fairly gloomy, boring day helping Grandma.

Once we had reclaimed our yard and home after shuttling a truck load of things that didn't sell to the Goodwill, it was time to focus on cleaning the house in preparation for the arrival of out-of-town guests that following week. Wouldn't you know that a few simple 'fixes' I felt necessary resulted in having to paint an entire room? And, the caulking that needed freshening around the tub and sink meant removing all the old and "Didn't I already do this?". Guess not, so there you have it, every little bit had to be replaced only to discover that the caulk I used must have been too old because it began 'ruffling' by the next day. Oh, well. At least it looks 99% better, but I will have to do it all over very soon. But, not today.

Our dear guests have all gone, now and it's time to get serious about the work at hand. There is much to be done to publicize the book and set up signings. Although I had been making strides to that end months ago, I now must re-group, dig out all my search information and get serious about selling some books. I am three chapters into a third book about Hoarding and hope to have a much easier time having it published. But, until then, I have copies on hand of the book I wrote for Josh, if you would like to own a copy.

TRIPPING GOING FULL-TILT

There's a falicy that people who seem to always be in an upbeat, positive frame of mind are never depressed, anxious or suffer the myriad of other negative conditions that plague humans in general. The sad fact is that, not only is this a false assumption, but when the 'always' positive individual has difficulty coping and needs to unload on the proverbial shoulder, quite often it isn't readily available. It's true. While struggling to stay afloat, we often wave off the would-be lifesaver with a curt word, smirky grin or shrug of the shoulder. I'll be okay, we say bruskly. Having been one to pre-guess the needs of others for most of my life, I couldn't understand why no one could do the same for me. Naturally, this attitude compounded my already sinking mood.

In a recent hour of need, I discovered that the only way anyone would be able to offer guidance was if I openly confessed the sad state of my mind, complete with all the gory details, which was incredibly difficult to do. Oh, but then not to have gone through all the frustration, the explaining, the longing and the sorrowful feeling that I was drowning in my own puke, would have left me without the grace of self-recovery. Yes, I did finally blurt out my plight to a choice few because I no longer wished to martyr myself in silient suffering. The remarkable thing is that I was forced to perform my own psychological diagnosis which began with some teachings of Buddha, walking with Christ and ended with me putting aside my favorite treat - my port! It was only then and after a really good night's sleep, that I could begin to function again.

Having slogged through this ordeal has fine-tuned my compassion radar. Not only will I be more attentive and compassionate when someone else is looking for help, but I will not be shrugging off the little signs that they might be in trouble. Being strong-willed, an Army Sargeant's daughter - 'stiff upper lip' and all, I will be more tolerant and caring when I detect a 'whine' or see a flicker of sadness from the eyes of a smiling face. Life is more subtle than overt, I think, becoming more obtuse and difficult to label as we thrust forward. And, we are thrusting! I vote for the slow horse and the smell of the fields after a spring rain. I will take the memory of the whipporwill with me to work and contemplate the magic of the moment when my mind is at rest.

Three days to yard sale! God bless you all!